Home is............

Ellie turned into the driveway of the home she had lived in for almost 70 years, the gears on her old Subaru creaking like her brittle bones. She wasn't hopeful that much would remain. It had been four days since the fires were tamed after one of the worst weeks of her long life and now she was coming home.

The fence that she and Dale had built together under the late spring sunshine, sharing sips of water so many years ago was all but gone. It had been fixed up so many times over the years but she knew it would never be whole again. Parking in the spot where the car port had once stood, Ellie carefully exited the vehicle and stood staring, inhaling the smoke that still pervaded the air. Nothing remained other than dust, rubble and charred wood, a few objects and charred remains mixed in amongst the mayhem.

Ellie closed her eyes and thought back to her arrival at Windrush, Dale driving annoyingly slowly along the drive, not wanting her to miss a thing. She remembered the Wattle growing along the old fence that barely contained the sheep that would be their main source of income. She recalled the Kookaburra sitting on a fence post, his raucous laughter welcoming her. Eyes open, she gazed at the space where the red door had once hung, a flashback of Dale carrying her 18 year old self across the threshold when they returned from their Honeymoon weekend. She blinked back tears, must be the smoke she told herself.

She briefly considered sifting through the rubble, searching for memories, but what was the point? Her life here was done. "No point crying over spilt milk," her mother would have said. Taking a walking stick from the car and skirting the house, Ellie began to slowly climb the hill where the flock had once grazed, imagining the various kelpies who had passed through her life, sorting them into some semblance of order. Remembering how she used to run up the same hill with sandwiches and a flask to share smoko with her husband.

Ellie made it to the top a little breathless, knees groaning, and sank down onto the large rock overlooking the valley. The valley that had once been verdant now blackened by fire, no sheep grazing, no dogs chasing, no husband walking towards her mopping his brow with a bandana. Reaching down, she felt the scars in the rock where they had scratched their initials inside a heart. It had been almost fifteen years since the accident, fifteen years of learning to be alone. Ellie didn't think she had been a very good student.

Now she was homeless as well as loveless. What would become of her? Taking a big breath she sank into the rock, closed her eyes again and sighed a sigh as deep as the ocean.